to walk the baby …

… or how do you translate “mit dem Baby gassi gehen”? Since our son got infected by his daddy he got a high athletic performs. Especially during the nights he is almost able to get full attention not only of his parents, but also of his neighbours (we are not in Italy anymore, so this is Sweden!). So, I guess, sick babies are hated everywhere. In order not to stress our walls from continuous beats, somehow alternating to our sons crying, I started to have a walk with him during the nights (of course after we have drugged him with all possible and allowed medications), somewhere around 1 and 4 a.m. The strange thing is that he is so nice outside and doesn’t even give noise from him and each time I approach our door he starts nagging. Another annoying thing is that I can not go to work, because the buses and subways stop operating at that time, otherwise it would have been a great opportunity, because: wife is sleeping and hopefully no one will complaining about crying baby noise at the university. I always wonder why our baby makes so much noise and why all the other parents can stay in their homes and sleep. What are we doing wrong? Since 4 month I am trying to record our son crying for 30 minutes, because each time we speak to a nurse or someone who pretends to know something about babies tells us that babies have to cry and that we have to learn letting them cry. Yeah, of course they have to cry, they can’t do anything else except eating, peeing, shitting and puking. Would be boring if they wouldn’t cry, but somehow ours seems to cry more and while crying he gets really wet. Tired of telling this to the nurses I want them to listen 30 minutes to his crying and than I wanna hear from them that that is a normal crying and that all the people who start knocking on the wall are just ignorants and that we are not able to distinguish between a cry and a CRY. Doctors and nurses are for me like people behind the information desk or those funny beings at costumer services. They know a lot, but never what you need. They bother you with useless information and questions (“Have you plugged your computer to the power supply?”, “Where did you insert the CD?”) and above all take your time and money. They needed 3 years to find out that my wife is almost deaf on one ear, because they never really checked it, just gave her medications or assumed that she is hallucinating about her pain and her bad hearing. That is the reason I stopped going to doctors, but instead I wait until I can go directly to the emergency room. No useless talk, no lost time, no stupid questions, no headaches. Here in Sweden they at least have a smile on their face while doing these things, in Germany they don’t even try that. Now, it is 3 a.m., had a nice 1 hour walk, are tired, but why should I sleep if Mr-I-am-a-baby-and-you-have-to-serve-me can wake up any second and wants a second tour? I can’t pump more drugs in form of suppositories in his body for at least 3 hours, so at least I can be Online until the next tour and find an answer to the question what people expect from me if they knock on our wall?

a) silence the baby? Great idea, why didn’t I come up with that?

b) move out? –> Italian hand gesture which the police in Forli showed me

c) …?

PS: The only help I found Online for “How to silence a baby?” was the following video. Not funny, but effective.

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